By Keely Kolmes, PsyD.
http://drkkolmes.com
Last January, there was an opinion piece in the New York Times, written by Richard Friedman on whether therapists should play Cupid for clients, basically performing as a matchmaker, setting them up on dates. The article focused primarily on the fantasies that some clinicians have about wanting to do this and the potential issues that could come up regarding transference. It did not speak directly to erotic transference, but I think this is a key component of such a question.
Following the article, HuffPost Live did a segment on which I was one of four guests interviewed about our points of view on the issue. As expected, the show included diverse opinions and even had the one clinician, Terah Harrison, who has expanded her practice to include matching services.
Another clinician, Dr. Lazarus, argued passionately that we are "uniquely well positioned" to make such matchmaking recommendations to our clients. Jeff Sumber agreed it was unethical but he admitted to having such strong fantasies about fixing up his clients that he'd deliberately scheduled people in hopes they might meet. (I imagine his clients are now wondering as they arrive for therapy if the person leaving is someone he has chosen for them?)
Guess which role I played on this segment? Yes, I was the conservative fuddy-duddy talking ethics, dual relationships, and risk management.
The entire story is here.
